The Written Word

A love for the written word runs in my family. All three of us (two sisters and myself) are mildly obsessed with it. My youngest sister actually is in school for creative writing. Her passion for what she does inspires me. I am determined to be able to write when I am happy. It is extremely difficult for me though, unfortunately. It takes dedication and discipline to catalogue my thoughts, and there are so many of them.
I have recently developed a love/hate relationship with James Joyce and his Stephen Dedalus. I have never had such trouble with a novel that I have had with Ulysses. It is difficult to read at best, but it is so decidedly brilliant because it captures perfectly the "stream of consciousness" style. I find my thought are often as random and careless as Joyce's, and that makes me love him.

Past lives

Have you ever made such drastic changes in your life that you feel like you've lived a completely separate life? Whether you've moved many miles and taken a completely different job or made entirely new friends... Sometimes the former life seems rise tinted. It's so easy to forget the hard parts and only remember the wonderful parts. Sometimes the bad parts even get romanticized so they seem wonderful.
It seems that this is my defining character trait at the moment in my life. I dream of times gone by, but as Dumbledore said "it does not do to dwell on dreams," or something like that. I forget how miserable I was because I only see the good things. Although I see that so many feel the exact same way. Ireland seems to somehow, even though it might be one of the most backward countries in the world, be one of the most intoxicating places in the world. Something about it seems to be so magical and melodious. The air of tragedy and melancholy seems to feed art. So many fantastic authors: Joyce and Yeats and Wilde and Beckett and Shaw to name just a few. That doesn't include the countless songwriters like MacGowan and Moore, or any that came before them.
Ireland will always be my true home, but I have learned and will continue to learn to be away.

Gratitude and nostalgia

As I write my never ending list of thank you cards from my wedding I can't help feeling overwhelmed by the love and generosity shown to my new husband and me.
On a different and much less deep note, I have been listening to Westlife radio on pandora all morning. It takes me way back to my preteen self. That girl ran wild around Sligo with her crazy little band of friends (some of whom, thanks to good old Facebook, she still talks to. I miss her sometimes. Her life was chaotic and there were times when she was absolutely miserable. I wish I could write her a letter telling her not to worry so much about her body or clothes. I'd tell her that she's beautiful even though she's taller than her friends and has horrible skin. I'd tell her to forget about boys for now and to just have fun being a little girl.
I say all of these things, but I really doubt that little Brittany would listen. She's too stubborn. That hasn't changed.
I really think that twelve-year-old Brittany would be proud of twenty-three-year-old Brittany. I have everything that she so desperately craves. Except for a perfect body. But that doesn't bother me like it used to. Having a man that truly loves you does WONDERS for your self-esteem. Although to be perfectly honest I had accepted myself long before he came along. I reached a point where I decided that I was beautiful and that I was sick of that evil voice in my head that did nothing but drag me down. So I silenced it, and I continue to silence it every day. It's hard work, but oh so worth it!

Enough Is Enough

"She decided to start living the life she dreamed of..."
You know that girl that lives inside your head? The girl who is so cool and does everything you've always wanted to do? The girl you've always wanted to be?
Well, to me, this girl paints, sings, plays guitar and piano and possibly other instruments, dances, and dresses like a boss. So I've decided to be this girl. I went out and bought paint and canvases the other day and I now have "leather" pants. It's all so new and exciting to me, and I finally feel like I am becoming the woman I've always wanted to be.

True Love?

I recently purchased a book of poems written by a man who holds a special place in my heart; W. B. Yeats. I came across a poem that was bookmarked by the previous owner called "Adam's Curse." In it a man speaks of his relationship with a "beautiful mild woman." A few lines stood out to me in particular. The first was "To be born woman is to know -although they do not talk of it in school - that we must labour to be beautiful." The second is actually the whole last stanza:
"I had a thought for no one's but your ears: That you were beautiful and that I strove to love you in the old high way of love; that it had all seemed happy, and yet we'd grown as weary-hearted as that hollow moon."
The narrator spends quite a while describing the "old high way of love," declaring that true love is found in books and ballads in poetry. Sometimes it is, but I believe that that reasoning is the cause of so much of the heartache that people are experiencing. So many people have these ridiculous expectations of love that no one could possibly live up to.
This brings me to a quote by L. M. Montgomery from her book Anne of Avonlea:
"Perhaps, after all, romance did not come into one's life with pomp and blare, like a knight riding down. Perhaps it crept to one's side like an old friend through quiet ways; perhaps it revealed itself in seeming prose, until some sudden shaft of illumination flung athwart its pages betrayed by the rhythm and the music. Perhaps...perhaps love unfolded itself naturally out of a beautiful friendship as a gold-hearted rose slipping from its green sheath."

The Way I See Things...

Wanderlust is somewhat of a defining character trait in my family. My father gets itchy if he's been living in a house too long (say three or so years.) Settling into my new life as a wife to a very stable (has moved twice in his entire life) man, I'd say I have some rough seas ahead of me. Stability is a trait I've always lacked and therefore have always craved, yet, at the same time, feared. Zelda Fitzgerald once said "She refused to be bored simply because she wasn't boring" and that has become a life motto of sorts for me. 
So what does this blog and blogging in general mean to me? It's a way for me to express and catalog my thoughts and interests. Those happen to be fashion, food, travel, blah blah blah, the same old same old, but topics may also include my faith, poetry, art (I have a print of Starry Night by Van Gogh waiting to be hung), books, movies, anything really. Although I am highly interested in fashion, I highly doubt there will ever be an outfit post on here, but you never know. I have been known to change my mind rapidly and frequently. 
The main reason I started this blog is to prove to myself that I can write when I'm happy. I had my fair share of teenage angst, and during those years, I churned out journal after journal. Now, that I'm past those years I find myself going months without even opening my journal. Perhaps I will keep this up, perhaps I won't. Either way, it's going to be quite an adventure.


     Word of the Day: Nomophobia - the fear that ensues when you don't know where your cellphone is. 

About:

"All good things are wild and free." - Henry David Thoreau

I guess I should introduce myself. My name is Brittany, and I am not afraid to admit that starting a blog is somewhat intimidating. I'm not sure why though. So, to start off, here's a few things about myself:
1. First and foremost, I am a Christian. That is the most important thing.
2. I abuse the travel section of Pinterest. Hotwire, Priceline, and Expedia are all bookmarked on my laptop, and I downloaded the Travelocity app onto my Ipod the other night. It is safe to say I have a rather severe case of wanderlust.
3. I am a natural dirty blonde, which is a nice way of saying my natural hair looks like unpolished pewter.
4. As a teenager I was a kick boxer, which led to bad arches, which led to me not really being able to wear heels. Like at all. I will now accept your pity.
5. I grew up in Ireland, and a very large portion of my heart will always be there.
6. I still have my very first car; the one I took my driver's test in. It will truly break my heart when the old bird dies.
7. I am rather obsessed with fashion and food. If I am not thinking about one, I am thinking about the other. This is not my fiance's favorite thing about me.
8. I have a fiance who will become a husband on June 9 of this year.
9. I am a consummate literature nerd. I also am rather a fan of art, music, culture, and architecture.
10. The Premier League is where it's at. Liverpool Football Club specifically is it. 

I think that's quite enough for now. Have a happy day!

Word of the day: Wanderlust - a strong desire to travel.